_ ,... ne‘ .1 was. "Unhvnm‘w-f' ,' raw 3 »: "3"4 rw ~‘-3"~ sin-Eer cw"? 1 n muff a W V” Published every Saturday morning at nine o'clock. NEW YORK, JUNE 8, 1895. B 3 Wm“ is sold by all Newsdealers milligram States and in the Canadian Dominion. Parties unable to obtain it from a Newsdealer, or those referring to have the paper sent direct, by mail, tom the publication office, are supplied at the following rates: Terms to Subscribers. Postage Prepaid: One copy, four months. . . ... .......... . 51.00 “ " one year .............. . 3.00 Two copies, one year ............. 5.00 In all orders for subscriptions be careful to give address in full, State, County andTown. The aper is always stopped, promptly, at expiration 0 sub— scription. Subscriptions can start with any late number. TAKE NOTICE. In sending money for subscri tion remit by Am. Express Money Order, Draft, . Order, or Be ' tered Letter, these being the best forms of re ttance. Losses will almost surely be avoided if these directions are followed. Foreign subscriptions may be sent to our European agents, the INTERNATIONAL NEws COMPANY, 11 Bon- v erle street (Fleet street), London, England WAD communications, subscri tions, and let- ters on business should be addresse to BEADLE AND ADAMS. PUBLIsHERs. 98 WILLIAM ST.. NEW YORK. ‘Happy-Ga—lucky Papers. Buggins and the Agricultural Papers. PILGRIM‘S CORNERS, MAss., CORNPLANTING TIME, 1895. DEAR BANNER:-— I am quite busy just now with agricultural pursuits (pursuing the hens that persist In com- ing into the garden and chasing tramps off the premises mostly), but Wiggins‘s land joms mine on one side and Josh Buggins owns the place on the other side, SO there is an Opportunity for a chat across the line fence, semi-occasionally or thereabouts, and in that way I manage to pick up considerable news and information. _ Wiggins is as good as a daily paper In local news and old-time reminiscences, while Buggius is a regular walking cyclopedia, chuck-full of solid information (some of it obtainable in no other Way except through Buggins, who ap- pears to have a copyright on it), philosophy, human nature, shrewdness, and a little. of everything that a man picks up in knocking around on this mundane Sphere. One thing that surprises me is to find that Buggins is down on the agricultural papers. I happened to be over by the line fence near. the road, talking about the weather and the crop prospect with Buggins, when an agent of the Farmer’s Friend and Hayseed Review came along and tackled him for a subscription. Buggins straightened up to his full height of sixrfeet-two (Buggins came to this place from Vermont, I understand, and he is almost as tall and rugged as some of the Green Mountains they boast of up that way, though not resembling them to any great extent in other respects), ejected half a pint Of tobacco-juice in the direc- tion of the agent’s well-polished boots, which he missed by about half an inch, and then drawled: “ Farmer’s Friend an’ Hayseed Review, eh?” “Yes, sir, and one of the best weekly agri- cultural papers published in the United States, or in the whole world for that matter,” glibly responded the agent, as he moved back a pace or so further out of range, “ and the best of it is, we have just reduced the subscription price from two-fifty to two doliars a year.” “Have, eh? Don’t throw in a quart of some new-fangled grass~seed, or a chrome of a settin’ hen or a yaller dog with the paper, besides re- uuciu’ the price, do you?” “ Why, yes, there is a premium, of course; but it is something out of the common run of inducements held out by other agricultural journals, I can assure—" “ I thought so. That’s what they all say,” interrupted Buggins, dryly. “ I never know any of ’em to send out a premium yet that wasn’t a little better than anything in that line ever heard of before, an’ worth at least double the price of the year’s subscription. That’s about what you assess yours at, Ipre- sume, hain’t it? ‘ The agent for the Farmer’s Friend, efc., got red behind the ears and the perspiration began to trickle. off the end of his nose, but he stood his grOund bravely, only retreating a step at a time, whenever it became necessary to preserve the polish on his boots intact. “ Well, my friend,” he went on, “ since you have Ementioned it yourself, I cannot do other- wise than admit that the premium offered this season with the Farmer‘s Friend and Hayseed Review is worth far more than the paltry cost of the year’s subscription. We are giving each subscriber an apple-tree, ready for transplant- ing; a new variety, got up specially for our paper, which ten years from date will produce enough fruit annually to pay for a dozen papers, and you will have plenty of apples to give away besides.” “ I s’pose so, but I can’t afford to pay two dole lars for a paper I’ve got no use for, jest to git a twanty-five cent apple tree. I’ve shet down on takin’ agricultural papers. Can’t afford to have ’em around. Takes up too much of my time readin’ ’em to find out how things orter be done to raise the biggest crops an’ make a grand suc- cess of farmin’, an’ then, when I do ’em the very way it says, it gener’ly turns out to be a fizzle. “ I took the Weekly Agriculturist and Sub- soiler, or Sub cellar, as some of ’em call it, one year, and what does the consarned paper up an’ do but say that you must be sure an’ plant your potaters in the full of the moon if you wanted a good crop. SO I tried it one night, when the sign was right, and the hired man fol- lered the example sot him by the moon, an’ got a little fuller’n there was any need of, an’ sprain- ed his leg fulliu’ over a bowlder, an’ was laid up on my hands for three Weeks, an’ the damp night air give me the rheumatiz, so I was almost as bad Off as the hired man, or maybe worse, an’ whet‘few potatoes come up didn’t get hoed or attended to, an’ the weeds choked about half of ’em to death, an’ the potater-bugs got the rest. Speakin’ of potater-bugs, Mister Agent, if you’ve got plenty of spare time, I’ll tell you a little anecdote that maybe you never heard of before, an’ which goes to illustrate that the editor of an agricultural paper sometimes puts his foot in it same as other folks. I was takin’ the Farmers‘ an’ Frm’t-Growers’ Guide to ll'ealfh at that time (though I want to say it never guided me very far in that direction) an’— “ Got to go now, have you, mister? Waal, I’m sorry if I’ve said anything to injure your feelin’s, and some time when you have somethin’ worth investin’ in, if you’ll call around ag’in I’ll talk to you. So long, mister, and don’t tear down any more of that fence than you can help in git— tin’ over it.” After the agent had disappeared around a bend in the road, Buggins yawned one of his Hoosac‘Tunnel yawns and said: “ It always makes me tired to onttulk an agent, butl sometimes hafter do it. Sorry he didn’t have time to hang around a spell longer until I got through with my pollster—bug anec- dote. I never like to break off right in the most interestin’ part of a story, but I guess the way he is travelin’ there hain’t much use of follerin’ him up, so I’ll work Off the rest of the yarn on you. As I started to say, I was takin’ a paper called the Farmers’ an’ Fruit Growers’ Guide to Wealth at that time, an’ one week the editor got feelin’ sorter frisky, an’ goodinatnred, an’ be ups an' Offers a prize for the best answer tothe conun- drum, ‘ What is meaner than a potater-bng i’ “ The prize was five dollars, and I sent in the answer ‘ Two potater-bngs, of course.’ an’ told the editor he could send along his Old ‘ V ’ by re- turn mail, but instead of doin’ it, he awards the cash to a feller who said ‘ if there was anything on earth meaner than a potater-bug, it was the man who didn’t pay up his subscription to the ‘paper when it was due.’ The cditor slapped in a little foot-note under the prize announcement sayin’ that upon consultin’ his books he found that several hundred of his subscribers were In the aforesaid boat, an’ if the shoe fitted ’em they could put it on. _ “ This kinder r’iled me, as I accidentally hap- pened’to be a month or so behind on my sub- scription jest at that time, an’ I’ll be hanged If I want any one horse agricultural editor'to call me a potater-bng, jest for a little oversight of that kind, so I paid up my back account an’ stopped the Farmers’ an’ Fruit-Growers’ Guide to Wealth, an’ sense that I hain’t bothered much with papers that make a specialty of lad— ling out advice to farmers. “ I’ve bin diggin’ a livln’ out of the ground fer forty-nine years or thereabouts, as nigh as'I can remember, an’ if I don’t know how to do It by this time better’n a two-dollars-a—year editor —who lives in a city the year round, an’ prob- erbly don’t know a sulky-pIOW from a mowrn’- machine—can tell me, then I’d better sell out an’ go into some other bizness—such as peddlin’ post-holes or pullin’ hens’ teeth, or some such light occypation as that. “ That’s the way it strikes yourn truly, an’ now I reckon Josh lan’ me’ll hafter git to work ag’in.” _ . , And with a snifi? of disgust, Buggms swung his hoe around into position and began slashing away at the weeds once more. NOAH N UFF. letter-pad Papers. What I Know About Music. IF you have not anything to do for a few minutes, I will lay this accordeon aside, and we will talk a little about music, which I know all about and hate to keep my knowledge of it, for fear that it will spoil on my hands, and you know what spoiled music is. The true definition of music is, sound, with all the noise jerked out of it, and it must be heard to be fully appreciated. You can look at a whole stack of written music of the finest order, but you can get no more idea of its sweetness than you can by looking at a roasted turkey and not eating it. Music that goes in one ear and not out of the other, is the most to be preferred, and there are only a few of us who can make that kind of music; and in making that you will find it neces- sary to pick out a whole lot of sweet sounds and put them together in a row; the selection re- quires great care; you must take each sound separately, hold it in your hand, and rap it with your knuckles to see if it is not cracked; then you ram them into your flute, or basedrum, and blow out at your leisure. My neighbors used to say I could play more than anybody else; this was a pretty high compliment, and I renewed my exertions. There is nothing like a. little timely encouragement as you go along. Music is written on lines that look like a fence, called a stafi‘, and the little black dots with tails to them, which look like tadpoles hanging on the different boards of the musical fence, have got more music in them than you would ever im- agine could be squeezed out. I learned to sing by first chalking the notes on our back fence and then climbing up and yelling each note out as I ascended the boards, and if fell over the top, all those different notes would come out of my mouth in a lump, in one. grand $010. In this way I got very proficient in the writing of music; some pieces which I wrote even puzzled a regular professor, with a diploma, so much so that he had to acknowledge, in pro- faneterms,that it could not be played, and that no man living could ever make anything out of it. You see this comes from long practice, and it is a difficult matter to write difiicult music, Why, when I sit down to the iano, people have to hold their ears; the music 8 too intense and ravishing; they can’t stand it; yet I am very modest, and don’t bra much about it. While in playing the piano seldom look where my fingers fa l on the keys; it does not matter with me, at all;music is sure to come, if the crowd does go. > “ In singing, the base has to get under the fence, and the alto straddles the top board. I have frequently, in singing alto, had to tie a string to my voice tokeep it from getting away from me, and it has sometimes gone clear out of sight, and I had to wait for it to come back again ;and in singing base, I have got so low that I often ran the whole thing in the ground. I sing very sweetly. The range of my voice is from A to &, and it has been remarked by high authority that it is as flexible as a cheap shirt bosom. I used to tune my voice to the music of the hinges of a barn-door, and you know that' is a big thing, and there is also more music in the swinging of gates than you perhaps imagine. There is one bad thing about music, and that is, when a fine piece is performed it does not last lon , butls gone, and nobody knows where, and I on’t see why some one don’t invent a plan to preserveit, say in bottles. I have caught tunes frequently, chased them down the road, and finally run them into a fence corner, but, after you catch them, you have to handle them as carefully as a ragged dollar-bill. I have also picked up tunes while I was Walk- ingk :loug the road, and put them in my poc e . I used to start the tune with a pitch-fork, though it was a little straining on my jaws to bite it, but, all the tuning forks in the world could not pitch music into some people. Some persons have fine large ears for music; but the trouble is they are all ears. Music is thin and ethereal. I have a piece of my own composing, (I composed it with sooth- Ing syrup.) which play alwa s at parties. It is very thin, but what it lacks n that it makes up in longitude. Somebody said it would become popular because it is long enough to reach clear around the world—and tie. It is written to be repeated seventeen times—and I alu ays go by the notes. . There is a great deal Of music in a violin. The lrttleothing isn’t very big, but it is chock full; though I have often looked into one and could see no music at all. If you want to learn to play nice tuner on a violin, you had better buy an old one that is used to playing fine music. A new one has had no practice, and it is difficult to learn it to play anything. As for myself, I can play excellently on a fiddle that hasn’t got a string to its bow. Anybody, almost, can play on a fiddle—if he knows just exactly how to get it out; a little difficulty may lie just there. [have got up a new system of notes, every one good for thirty days, by which the learner can learn, provided the teacher will take the notes for the instruction. (lnclose two stamps.) On the piano I have a strong touch, from the fact, perhaps, that I used to work at the black- smith business, and they don’t make the keys as strong as they ought to. People say they could dieto hear t e mrisic I make, and that they would if they had a sufficient quantity of it. You see, my son, there is nothing like having a talent that is fully appreciated by the public, and I never made any pretensions. I can set a piece of music before me, and take a bass drum, and play sweetly for half an hour at a time, without ever looking at the notes, and pay no attention to the rests in it. Music hath charms, my son. Those young ladies over the way there, in the course of a few hundred years, will become almost proficient musrcrans if they work as hard at it as as they have for the last eight years. They need en— couragement, but I haven’t any to give. I have written pieces of music so perfect that they played themselves, requiring no instru- ment, and they had to be cut in two, put In tight boxes, and one placed in the barn, and the other in the woodshed under the chips. But I try not to compose that way-and generally succeed. You see, there is very little discount on my notes, and they are the staff I generally lean on. The beauties of the hand organ, my son, have never been fully estimated or appreciated. A year or so of practice will enable you to execute all the airs that are in it, and make you a per- fect organist, and in great demand at the churches. You can turn the crank and turn many an honest penny. Ishall gee you one, be- fore long for a present if you are a good boy and don’t mind ourself so much, an nobody else; and, as a ittle preparatory exercise, you can come out here and turn the grrndstone for you have put a nick in the ax that will lake several nicks of time to obliterate. Don’t growl. - I know the ice is thick enough, but your excuse is too thin. - PRESERVED POITSfP. H. D. Bannerettes. THE Philadelphia advent of the Wild West Show was a. new triumph for the remarkable combination. The stay was allotted to two weeks, and the strife for seats and boxes was such that the police had to be on hand, each day, in force, to keep the crush from being a crash. The personal reception accorded to Cody would have disconcerted a steadier head, for ple came on even from army headquarters at Washington to give him a greeting, so that before and after each performance the reception was an ovation. The “season,” therefore, at the Quaker City, was a big one financially and personally—es it well deserved to be, for the Show is one in which not only its proprietors but every good American may take pride. THE development of speed in naval ships is quite revnlutioniziug all ideas of war. Armor plates are no longer a protection, for the awful power of the new guns seems destined to make armor comparatively v'alueless in defense. Now comes speed as a sta rtlrng factor in the problem of destruction. lVe are told that Thorney- croft’s latest torpedo-boat destroyer for the Briti~h Government, the Bruiser, made an average of 28.114 knots in six runs over the measured mile in very bad weather. In the three hours’ trial the mean speed attained was 27.97 knots. Which means, of course, that even our fastest cruisers are at the mercy of the lit- tle, half-submerged craft, that no big ship can dodge and no art can turn from destructlon. War, therefore, in the very near future, must become all too horrible for contemplation, and our huge ships and huge naval expenditures be all for naught. The astuteness and acuteness Of the Indian mind is confessed by all who have had occasion to test it. We have heard from those familiar with the man, that Sitting Bull, the Sioux, was wonderfully sagacious—veritably a noble mind, if a savage. The good bishop of Minnesota, Whipple, tells of how he was disconcerted by the argumentum ad hominem of the Dakota chief, Wabasha. A war-dance was orderedto be held near one of the missions, whereat the bishop, in person, resolvad to interfere; so he proceeded to interview the chief. “ Wabasha,” he said, “ you asked me for a missionary and a teacher. I gave them to you. I visit you, and the first sight is this brutal scalp dance. I knew the Chippeway whom your young men have murdered. His wife is crying for her husband; his children are asking for their father. Wabasha, the Great Spirit hears his children cry. He is angry. Some day he will ask Wabasha, ‘ Where is your redbrotherf’” The old chief smiled, drew his pipe from his mouth and said: “ White man go to war with his own brother in the same country: kill more men than Wabasha can count in all his life. Great Spirit smiles; an s ‘ Good white man! He has my book. I love h m very much. I have a good place for him by-and-by.’ The Indian is a wild man. He has no Great Spirit book. He kills one man, has a scalp dance. Great Spirit is mad and says, ‘ Bad Indian! I put him in a bad place by-and-by.’ Wabasha don’t believe itl” so the scalp dance went on and the bishop had nothing more to say. I We are told by a society reporter that “ writers of. etiquette books—the authorities that gravely advise you not to eat with your knife, how to write a love letter and whether it’s the proper thing to wear green gloves at a wake—besieged with questions upon subjects of similar impor- tance, for which they receive quite handsome fees, according to the importance of the subject. Whether to eat with the knife or otherwise is answered upon reccipt of a very small sum indeed—$1 being the lowest. Ques- tions of clothes come higher, and affairs of the heart, as always, cost like everything. It is in regard to the latter, however, that the etiquet- tist is chiefly called upon for his opinion, show- ing that ex use is of little weight in such crises.” A] of which is merely silly. When a dozen or more excellent papers of wide circula- tion, make a specialty of ansWers to queries, and give such advice gratuitously, why should the querist go to these “authorities?” and pay big prices for information'rl We don’t think it true that such “ authorities” make money by the Etiquette Bureau dodge. “ Matters and Things. THE BED on Gun DADDIEs. “ SHAVINGS are coming into~demand for bed and mattress filling, and the Wisconsin planing mills have struck a bonanza in packing them in bales like hay and sending them all over the country to be used for that purpose.” ——WEerRN DAILY. I don’t think much of shavings for bed and mattress stuffing, but at any rate they are an improvement on the coarse rye-straw, Canada thistles, corn~cobs, dried bean-pods, corn-stalks. burdock-burrs, thorn-bushes, prickly-ash boughs and the rest of the conglomeration of night— mare-evoking horrors that were used for that purpose thirty or forty years ago, or even twenty years ago for that matter. In fact, that style of mattress may be in use yet in certain sec- tions of the country for all I know, though for the sake of the rising generation I hope not. How well (and with ashudder even yet!) I recall sleeping on one of them when I was a boy. True there was usuallya feather bed on top of the lllattress, or straw-tick as it was called, but u feather-bed that understood its business would either crawl off the bed onto the floor, as soon as a fellow went to sleep, or roll up In a wad down by his feet, leaving the rest of his anatomy exposed to the remorseless jab- bing and tortures of that relic of the inquisition underneath. On such occasions I always used to dream that I was being ridden on a rail or had got ' stuck fast in a barbed wire fencr. or some pleasa_ut little thingr of that sort, and I used to sometimes think if I could learn to sleep stand- Ing up, same as a horse, that style of resting wouldbe an agreeablechange from sleeping in a bed wrth that sort of a mattress on it. So, sneer at the shaving-stuffed mattress as we Will, if the rising statesmen, poets, drama- tists, electricians, clvil—engineers,mechanics and tillers of the soil of the present day, haVe noth— Ing more conducive to sore muscles and in- somnia than that to do their slumbering on they may consider themselves pretty fortunate, after all. Cedar shavings may not be as oft and soothing as elder down, exactly, but they are a mighty big improvement on the old-fashioned straw—tick or husk-bed of our ancostors; and if any one doubts my word, I’ve got one of the old- nations, once owned by a great-uncle of mine on my wife’s side, up in the garret to prove It. “ BEWARE or THE DOG.” Poo is who own watchdogs ought _not to stay out t ll three o’clock in the morning-not If the regard a whole skin (not the dog’s but their own, of course) as being of any value. A dog, no matter how affectionate and gentle he may be, When suddenly aroused at that un- reasonable hour of the night is a t to be more or less touchy and ubsent-minde , and before settling down to his normal condition and turning in for another nap, the Intruder, be he friend or foe, is more or less liable to get hurt. If you own a watch-dog, and are compelled to remain out seven or eight hours later than usual some evening, it is a good plan to wear a suit of sheet-iron armor upon going home, and also go accompanied by a large hickory club. Mr. Hagerman, or some other man—I forget the exact name—of Flatbush, L. I., neglected taking these necessary precautions upon return- ing to his domicrle at the l for him) unusual hour of 3 A. M.,-the other morning, and as a conse- quence of his thoughtlessness he is putting in twenty-four hours a day in the hpsprtal, waiting for the cuticle on various portions of his an- atomy to grow together again where the doctors stitched it up, while his faithful watch-dog In still on deck, guardin the remrses with the vigilance of a Ten erloin reclnct co on the lookout for the patrolman, or a cat watc ing a mouse, and wondering in a vague sort of way what has become of his master and why the rest of the family stand afar off and look at him in that tone of voice. Wine or the Wits. SHE DREW THE LINE. Mus. GRAY--“ Have you named the baby ct?” . y MRS. W'HITE——“N0, we haven’t settled on a name yet, but one thing is certain. I never will consent to any of the names that Mr. I’Vhite called it the other night when it cried so for two hours.—-Boston Transcript. HE LOVED MAY. “THERE‘S nothing more beautiful than the month of May,” she sighed tenderly. “ I wish that it could last forever. ” “So do I,” he answered fervently. “ You, too, are fond of nature, then.” “ Yes, indeed. Besides, I haVe a note coming due on the 1st of June.”— Washington Slur. IT WASN'T CORRECTED. “ WELL, 1 did think on had more education than that,” said Mr. J co us, airily, to the grocer. “ ‘ N-o-t-i c ’ doesn’t spell 'notice.’ It comes nearer spelling ‘ no tick ’ than anything else.” “ Yes," said the grocer, “ that is what it means." Mr. J oobus concluded that he could get along that evening without any apricots.— Cincinnati Tribune. WAITING. “ WHY don’t you fellows put fenders on your cars?" asked the inquisitive citizen. “ You know the would be a good thing.” “ We iscussed that at a meeting of the board of directors not lon ago,” said the magnate, “ and we came to t e conclusion that if we waited awhile perhaps some liniment manufacturer might put them on free for the privilege or having his advertisement on them.” -—Was ington Star. TEE UN CERTAIN PUBLIC. “ TEEnE seems to be a limit to tbgvpower of kin s, after all," said Emperor lllam morose y. “I don’t like to acknowledge that I’m vanquished, but I’m very much afraid l’ll haw to.’ “ What is the matter, your highnessi” “ I’m a little bit disappointed, that’s all. The Napoleon revival and the Triiby craze both prosper beautifully, but my Aegir fad doesn’t seem to get along worth shucks.” THE ONLY SOUL. “ FWIN Oi kem over in ’68," said Mr. Grogan, “ 0i was the only soul on board the ship.” “Aw, what are you givin’ us?” asked young Finnegan. " It is the trooth Oi am givin’ yez. The rist av thim was all Orangemin and Dutch.” It was with great satisfaction that Mr. Grow gan downed his schooner as he listened to the rattle of Mr. Finnegan’s dime falling into the till.——Indianapolis Journal. BWINDLED. “ N0,” said the pensive maiden, “ it is impossi- ble that this engagement should last longer. I thought I loved one once, but I know better n0w. Can you forgive me?” “Well, I should say not,” hissed the young man, making a grab for his hat. “For more than a year—all for you—I have not been to a picnic; I haVezplayed no billiards; I have not taken a drink; I have turned the cold shoulder on every girl that has tried to flirt with me. How am I going to get paid back for all the fun I have missed? Oh, yes. I’ll forgive you—I don’t think.”—Indianapolis Journal. A CONNIVING JUDGE. IN a case before an Iowa court, in which a popular actress has had to appear as a witness, the judge seems to have shown considerable diffidence about asking the lady, as he was in duty bound to do, what was her age. Evident- ly he considered that such a question put .to a witness would be a direct incitement to perjury, so he asked her her age before she had been sworn. ~ “ How old are you, madam?” he said. After a little hesitation, the lady owned to be- ing twenty-nine years of age. “ And now that you have told the court your age,” continued the gallant judge, “ you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.”-— Cincinnati Times-Star. SUGGESTING AN EXPERIMENT. IT was at the theater, and the young man had seen the play before. He let everybody for four seats around know that, and he kept telling inst what was coming and just how funny it would be when it did come. e had a pretty girl with him, and he was trying to amuse her. At length he said: “ Did you ever try listening to a play with your eyes shut? You‘ve no Idea how queer it seems.” . A middle-aged man milk a red face sat just in front. He twisted himself about in his seat and glared at the young man. “ Young man,” said he, “did on ever try listenin to a play with your mouth shut?” _ And t e silence was almost 'painful.—— ll’ash- mgton l’osl‘. CHOICE SOON MADE. “ CAN we get anything to eat on the cars, papa?” anxrouly inquired the little four-year— old, who. was getting ready for her first long railway Journey. f‘ Certainly, l’uss,”re filed her father. “ There wrll be a dining-car on he train.” “ But We'll get awful hungry waiting for din- ner. Won’t there be any breakfast-car?” “ You don’t understand, dear. We shall get our breakfast in the dining-car.” “ \Vhat’ll there be to eat?” “ Well, there will be a bill of fare that will have the names of ever so many kinds of food on It: You can have beefsteuk, mutton chops or fried chicken; baked potatOes, fried potatoes‘ or boiled potatoes; ham and eggs. oatmeal, hoé biscuit, graham bread, raw or cooked fruits coffee, tea or chocolate. Now, with all that be1 fore you, what would you choose?” “ Cake.”——Chicago Tribune. time, walnut-shell-and-fence-rail-stufl’ed abomi- . . birth-mark remain. Corresponufls’ Column." [This column is open to all «- Mm r‘ Inquiries answered as fully and am _ I circumstances will permit. Con 7 tion. entered as “declined” ma be m o'— I cepted. No 1188. return unless stamps inclosed.l ’ "Wh.o Declined: “ A War Record,’ eto.; n _ the Suicide?” “- Mrs. Adjective John,” ‘ " The Rustler Chief’s lnheritsnco;” “Ba leg Bob’s Boom ;” " The Widow’e Might;” ‘9 on a Sets of Paper;” "Grand Canyon Ad ture;” “ I lito’s Ghost.” 11. L. A. The book, “Slang and Its ‘. g logues,” gives a quite complete Slang v s M lary. —— OrIs ELEVATOR. Certainly you _ patent—right your idea. Be sure to take ; atent in your own proper name.——BRAGG, do in Louisiana are very cheap. V v ( bar, down there, but rather unreliab e. Your «v . ject ought to work.—-MAYPOLE. As to C I paternit , see the enealogy given in Luke ‘ —VAN IEN ST. , e English of the deal : as quoted, is “ le al” enough, but it is about able in style or orm.—SAH G. If the a .2 does not answer, it can mean but one t ,« that correspondence is not wanted.—— ROSE f The words “ Hebrew,” “ Jew ” “ Israelite ” are practically identical, though I-Iebrew really : lies the race and Jew the religion.--Asn I ’AIrK READER. If the cottage was routed nus der restrictions, they hold, of course. no matter who occupies the house.—-—-WIIEATLEIoH. l, spar is simply a fine specimen of common . matic feldspar. . H. L. I). “Scouts” are in such poor demand that they are not worth ten cents on the dollar Turn our talents in some better and more sible direction. ’ MADISON M. Buffalo Brll has no priv secretary. He attends to his own correspond-p ence, as a rule, but of course refers all businelfi letters to the business manager. . CAMPUS. Don’t think the professor was "ark" bitrary.” Your marking being below the av age, it was his duty to order you to study; he paid to see that students don’t shirk. EPH E. Marriage of cousins is not forb den; it is of frequent occurrence. Of secon cousins the same. Your names being alike is, nothing. Go ahead with your arrangements. _, SEAerE J UANA. As there are more'than one hundred seaside resorts within one hundred ml of New York, it is difficult to suggest. If cheap» ness is essential, try resorts south of Asbury, on the Jersey coast. R. R. A. A “ caveat” on your invention protect it from infringement, for a year. The cost or fee is $10. On the completion of the' machine, take out a full patent. Consult an patent lawyer as to the caveat. 1 AL B. All depends on the by-laws of the; club. If five negative votes reject, a motion to reconsider is not in order if the by-laws 03‘ the limit at five. The rejection is, by that no; itself, final. Tinker your by-laws. DOOR-KEEPER. Can’t say what would _ your authority, in such a case. You cannot _ actual violence to keep the person out, for th ‘ would be assault. An officer only can arrest n %. eject. An officer ought always to be present. MAJOR J. C. As the pension dies withy you can“ entail” nothin . All pensionsw sooner or later cease. our “war -...r should be deposited in Congressional Ll ' Consult with Mr. Spofiord, the Librarian, letter. V IRMA D. The discoloration can onl movod by cuttln away the entity, affected-«a terrib e operation. as new be supplied b5: u- tigfiyokfil bodleeorlim I! My, B..l. W. The particles, nor and or; interchangeable, n reality, yet are 00,11 ._ the quotation. Or is to be used as the. al rive of either-either one or the other; w nor Is the alternative of neither or - «- neither one nor the other. 1. , DIME Novnusr VETERAN. The origi Beadle Dime Novels issued in 1860. They w before the De Witt Ten Cent Romances‘ ‘ several {rears before the ()rnum Indian Novels? and the the pioneer series, in a double sense. VENICE. If the spring is wholly On your land you are its exclusive owner unless rights tar When tilew use of it have been sold or deeded. overflow reaches another’s land you lose a rights to the water at that oint. he analysis you submit gives a valuab e aperient and tonic property. ArruENTICE. If you could attend a technie cal school it would greatly advance you in ac- . quiring your trade. Why not work at you!" trade and save your earnings with reference to ‘ a.year in the Pratt Institute! You are wholly- right in your wish to be something more than a» journeyman. HADDER. The shade in the yard can be over- come by a tin reflector, say 6x feet. Make this so swing on center bearing that it can be made to conform to movement of the sun. It will. throw sunlight all over your " patch” and make the garden bloom as finely as if the sun- light shone direct. BLELOCK. If the parent, or guardian, or trustee, ordered the improvement on the erty, the property is responsible, or the girl: estate. Prove that the work was needless,or / made for any other purpose than to benefitthe property, then the remedy is a. suit against, the trustee or guardian. SUSQUEIIANNA~ STUDENT. The argument “ a. posteriori” is reasoning from consequences, effects or results. The ‘ your logic for such information. study for training you to correct reasoning. methods. HARsmns. Wood ashes are of rime value“; as a fertilizer; coal ashes of very l ttle value—- no potash in them. Would suggest that the? heavy bog grass be cut and spread ovor the land. in the fall, and burned in the spring, when thoroughly dr . It will be as good as a coatof .. manure. Don t bother with the ashes from the engine; it will not pay. ED 0. We do not care to " discuss ” the? authorship claim. That “Marching Through Georgia ” was written by Henry Clay Work, of Hartford, Conn., in “<65, music and wordle beyond question. An enormous copyright salt by Its publishers determines the true anther- .‘i 7. ship. just after the war, viz.: “ \Vnke Nicodemusz” “ We are Coming, Sister Mary ;" “ Lily Dale,” : etc... etc. Mus. ALPIN C. The poem is by l’lrmbe Quay, not by Alice. It is now in many of the hymn The stanza you refer to ls:—- But lying darkly between, Winding down through the night, Is the silent, unknown stream That leads at last to the light. The volume you want is the memorial to Alice ' and Phrrbe Cary prepared by Mar Clamm‘i‘ Amos. lt givesun intimateaud care ul mm " of the life and work of the poet sisters. Mon any bookseller will supply it. .DELANO. Style in expressin ideaslsoften‘ times of more account than tfi selves. A writer who is ignorant Of, or indlfb fereut to, literary ark-precision of exprem't'i and beauty of its form-4s poorly equip for ' literary work. Make rhetoric, there 0 special studv. It will be of immense utl not only In forming style but in ellminatlo or suggesting thought itself. The loose, bung unprecrse English of much of our journs'll' V discloses the comparative ignorance or illite of the writer to the well~informed mg reader. Bo convinced of me well informed you wil the practical value of the adv a priori ” argument is x the correlative of “a posteriori”~—proceeding' from the cause to the effect. You must gotc‘ e ideas tum " uuro Ten Cent Novels:—-—in fact, were: I. w.” Vork also wrote a dozen other songs. . Wl‘llt‘h had extraordinary currency during and "